Teaching2014-11-24·16 min

Encourage Inside

Encourage Inside

Eben Pagan teaches how to transform destructive self-criticism into encouraging inner dialogue that fuels business success. He reveals how negative self-talk sabotages entrepreneurs and provides specific techniques for developing loving, supportive internal communication.

Encourage Inside

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Key Moments

How to Transform Self-Criticism into Self-Encouragement -- A systematic approach to changing your inner dialogue from destructive criticism to supportive encouragement

Failure in Knowledge Work Is Learning Not Criticism

Failure in knowledge work environments is actually learning and should be congratulated, not criticized

3:21

Transform Inner Voice to Loving Encouraging Confident Tone

Transform your inner voice to the most loving, encouraging, soft yet strong, positive, confident tone

11:41

Generalize Long-Term Success Around Short-Term Setbacks

Generalize long-term success identity around short-term setbacks instead of the reverse

10:20

The Constant Inner Radio Most People Never Notice

Your mind runs a constant inner radio of self-talk that most people don't notice but significantly impacts performance

0:30

Daily Affirmations Starting With I Deserve

Create affirmations starting with 'I deserve' and 'I give myself permission to' and practice them daily

13:32

Relevant Clips22

  • How-To

    How to Transform Self-Criticism into Self-Encouragement -- A systematic approach to changing your inner dialogue from destructive criticism to supportive encouragement

  • Teaching0:30

    The Constant Inner Radio Most People Never Notice

    Your mind runs a constant inner radio of self-talk that most people don't notice but significantly impacts performance

  • Teaching2:27

    Self-Criticism Is Always Self-Referential

    Self-criticism is always self-referential - when you criticize others, you're actually criticizing yourself

  • Teaching

    Parental Criticism Creates the Automatic Inner Voice

    Self-criticism comes from parents who criticized to protect from danger, creating an automatic inner voice

  • Teaching3:21

    Failure in Knowledge Work Is Learning Not Criticism

    Failure in knowledge work environments is actually learning and should be congratulated, not criticized

  • Teaching13:32

    Daily Affirmations Starting With I Deserve

    Create affirmations starting with 'I deserve' and 'I give myself permission to' and practice them daily

  • Teaching11:41

    Transform Inner Voice to Loving Encouraging Confident Tone

    Transform your inner voice to the most loving, encouraging, soft yet strong, positive, confident tone

  • Teaching10:20

    Generalize Long-Term Success Around Short-Term Setbacks

    Generalize long-term success identity around short-term setbacks instead of the reverse

  • Answer7:16

    Rewire the Inner Voice to Loving and Encouraging

    Change your inner voice tone to loving and encouraging, like speaking to someone's highest potential. Most people use a critical, whiny, or angry internal voice that triggers negative emotions.

  • Answer6:00

    Congratulate Yourself for Trying — Then Generalize the Win

    Congratulate yourself for trying something new. In knowledge work environments, you need to fail often to innovate. Generalize your long-term success identity around short-term setbacks.

  • Answer

    Watching Progress Encouragingly vs Watching It Harshly

    Helpful self-awareness watches your progress and speaks encouragingly. Harmful self-criticism takes the same observation but interprets it negatively and speaks harshly to yourself.

  • Answer12:20

    Write I Deserve Affirmations Daily in a Loving Voice

    Create affirmations starting with 'I deserve' and 'I give myself permission to.' Write them daily and speak them in a positive, loving voice to train your mind proactively.

Show 10 more
  • Answer2:27

    Self-Criticism Inherited from Parental Protection Instinct

    Self-criticism often comes from parents who criticized to protect you from danger. This becomes an automatic inner voice, but criticism focuses on what NOT to do rather than helping you succeed.

  • Quotable0:30

    Harsh Inner Tone Never Produces Winning Outcomes

    You don't win when you criticize yourself and when you speak to yourself in a negative tone of voice, in a harsh tone, when you're mean to yourself inside of your mind.

  • Quotable0:30

    Whether Criticizing Others — You Are Criticizing Yourself

    Whether it's you're criticizing yourself or you're criticizing someone else, you're always criticizing yourself.

  • Quotable8:12

    Turn the Inner Radio to the Loving Myself Station

    We want to turn the radio station to the loving myself station.

  • Quotable4:46

    You Cannot Sail to England by Avoiding America

    You can't sail to England by trying to avoid America.

  • Question1:24

    Helpful Self-Awareness vs Harmful Self-Criticism

    What's the difference between helpful self-awareness and harmful self-criticism?

  • Question11:41

    Stopping Negative Self-Talk That Undermines Business Confidence

    How do I stop negative self-talk that's hurting my business confidence?

  • Question6:00

    Affirmations That Build Business Confidence

    What affirmations should I use to build business confidence?

  • Question5:45

    Why You Criticize Yourself After Business Failures

    Why do I criticize myself when I fail at business tasks?

  • Question3:21

    How to Handle Business Failures Without Self-Destruction

    How should I handle business failures and setbacks?

Entities Touched

The Inner Radio of Self-Talk

Eben reveals that everyone has a constant inner dialogue running like a radio station, with most people unaware of its negative impact. This self-talk typically involves harsh criticism that sabotages success rather than supporting it.

Why Self-Criticism Doesn't Work

Self-criticism comes from parents trying to protect through correction, but it focuses on what NOT to do rather than positive direction. In modern knowledge work environments, this approach actually hinders the innovation and risk-taking required for success.

Transforming Your Inner Voice

The solution involves changing your internal voice tone to loving and encouraging while creating affirmations that start with 'I deserve' and 'I give myself permission to.' This proactive approach trains your mind for success rather than waiting for failures to criticize.

Counterpoint 3

Claim:Criticism helps you improve and avoid mistakes

Reframe: You don't win when you criticize yourself - criticism focuses on what NOT to do rather than what TO do

Claim:Failure means you're bad at something and should feel ashamed

Reframe: Failure is learning and should be congratulated in complex knowledge work environments

Claim:Self-love and encouragement are weak or unrealistic

Reframe: Loving yourself and encouraging yourself is the foundation for sustainable success

Topics

Coaching Strategies

productivity optimizationcoaching confidence

Common Mistakes

self-criticismidentity attachment to failuresinherited criticism patterns