Eben PaganDiscovery Hub

Use 'you' when pointing to strengths and asking questions, and 'we' when pointing to weaknesses, mistakes, and fears to avoid disconnection.

Use 'you' when pointing to strengths and asking questions, and 'we' when pointing to weaknesses, mistakes, and fears to avoid disconnection. Say 'you can lose 20 pounds' but 'we all get tempted when it's late at night'—including yourself in the weakness maintains rapport.

1Taught in programs1Clip evidence2Related concepts
Use 'you' when pointing to strengths and asking questions, and 'we' when pointing to weaknesses, mistakes, and fears to avoid disconnection. Say 'you can lose 20 pounds' but 'we all get tempted when it's late at night'—including yourself in the weakness maintains rapport.

Relevant Clips1

  • Teaching13:32

    You vs We Pronouns for Strengths and Weaknesses

    Use 'you' when pointing to strengths and asking questions, and 'we' when pointing to weaknesses, mistakes, and fears to avoid disconnection.

    → Canonical teaching